With that in mind and the fact that I had so successfully washed my latest dry clean only dress in the washing machine...I decided that for Lauren and Johnny's wedding on Sunday I would wear a dress with the same instructions that survived the same wash and had kindly been passed down to me by my friend Jane.
Johnny and Lauren's theme for the day was a gangster/NewYork one and Robin had decided to get suited and booted to blend in. As a devoted wife, I had been thinking long and hard as to what kind of dress a gangster's lady would wear and after a few try ons settled on this little number.
Now, I have a size 20 bust and a size 14 waist, so getting a dress to fit is always a tricky task. This one fitted really well, if not a tad firm over the upper half, but hey, that's what husbands are for, pulling up zips that you can't reach yourself!
We headed off into Aberdeen, leaving plenty of time to find the Chester hotel. It's a newly done up venture that Johnny and Lauren booked a few years ago, knowing they would be one of the first couples to get married there. As we drove through Aberdeen the cherry blossoms were out in full bloom and my favourite foliage, the Peirus forest flame, with it's vibrant leaves that turn red/pink, at this time of the year. I spotted it last year as we went into a wedding at the Palm Court hotel and was so taken with it that I bought a small one for the garden.
We found the hotel, with the help of google maps and as we were parking Johnny was walking down to the entrance of the function suite. Well, I could see straight away why Lauren fell in love with him so quickly. As we approached him, Robin introduced me and Johnny said, "Well, you've punched well above your weight there Robin"...adorable, one of my all time favourite people already!
Everyone was setting up and buzzing about as we came in and the staff were incredibly attentive offering us teas or a glass of water, nothing was too much bother. The decor was lovely and fitted in really well with all the vintage NewYork bits and bobs that were around.
As the guests came through to be seated we spotted a few trilbys and pinstripe suits as family had taken on board the theme. Lauren came in on her Dad's arm looking every bit a Hollywood star. Her dress was really stunning, layers of veil with pale purple embroidered flowers that sparkled beautifully as she made her way down the aisle.
The ceremony went well. Robin had aquired a new set of Scottish ox horn quiaches which made a great addition to the ceremony and allowed everyone to toast the happy couple with a drink or a raise of the quiache. Their handfasting was with a strip of Stewart tartan that came from Johnny's side of the family and as they said their own personal vows to each other, the new Mr and Mrs Lamb walked out to applause and 'New York, New York' by Frank Sinatra.
Poor Alistair, the videographer, started to feel ill and began to panic, thinking he might faint and drop his camera on the floor while filming the ceremony. He managed to hand over to his assistant and go have a seat ,in a seamless motion, without collapsing on top of the wedding party. At a wedding that we were at a few years ago the videographer did indeed pass out stone cold during the bestman's speech. As a little circle gathered round the poor man, who had made a massive thud as he fell, the bestman continued on regardless, thinking it was just someone who'd had a bit too much to drink. Hard life taking video all day you know!We enjoyed a seat in the bar while all the photos were being taken and Pat, Lauren's Mum, came up to show us her beautiful Mother of the Bride outfit. We've known Pat for many years as she used to live in Macduff, just round the corner from us, as the kids were growing up. So it's so lovely to see them all again.
We went through for the meal and got a chance to congratulate Lauren and Johnny as they lined up to greet their guests. I got a chance to snap the amazing NewYork skyline cake that they had made, and it was a good thing that I did as the first thing they did when they came in, was cut the cake.
All the tables were named after parts of NewYork. Ours was Long Island and we were sitting with a few couples that we knew, so it was great having a catch up.
Pat did a wonderful, Mother-of-the -bride speech and Ziggy the bestman gave away some of Johnny's deep dark secrets, forcing him to try on a mankini and a bib over his wedding suit ( I'll say no more). It was all going wonderfully well..
Well......at this point I was twisted round, as my back was to the top table...no, I'm not going to blame the seating plan. I'm actually struggling to write this now as I know that a large percentage of you will shake your heads in derision...but , as I turned back to the table at the end of the bestman's speech to toast the bride and groom. I felt that feeling that I really hoped I would never feel again in my whole life.....yes, that pop and loosen of my dress zip!
How can this happen twice in two weeks?? I'm panicking, going a ghastly shade of grey, wondering how I can get to the toilet without revealing my magic knickers to the world. Well, all I can say is thank goodness for my pashmina. I waited patiently till the end of the speeches and the cards were read out and gracefully rose from my chair with my pashmina pulled down at the side and sprinted like a woman with an exceptionally full bladder, to the nearest loo!
This time I have my sewing kits...but no time to sew...the panic grows.....the safety pins, maybe if I could just pin it together and hide the damage, it would work. Let me tell you folks, I'm going to buy a set of nappy pins, because those little things you get in a sewing kit are no good under pressure.
My meal was about to be served out and I certainly didn't have time to sew anything. So I draped my pashmina as gracefully as possible at a jaunty fashionable angle, held my head high and walked back out for my meal.
And what a lovely meal it was, tainted only by the fear that my carefully placed covering would shift and reveal all to the next table. We finished up and Robin had the gem of an idea to give me his jacket to wear and so, with a slide and a swing, I popped it on and hey presto, a new fashion statement is born...it looked quite good, though I say it myself and we were able to go round saying our farewells with confidence.
Having not really seen the kids for the whole weekend we really had to leave early and as the band were just setting up, we had to head before the first dance. Through the joys of FB though I added Lauren as my friend and saw their first dance on video this morning!
"At last", by Etta James was the perfect dance for these two lovely people. And they looked so happy as they sang the words to each other.
As we reached home I told Phoebe about our wonderful day. After she had stopped laughing when I showed her the side of my dress, we decided that it was worth my humiliation to share with you all the second zip incident...though if it happens again I'm just going to lie about it ok?
Even that didn't spoil our day in any way. We had such a lovely time with everyone and will be waiting with bated breath to see the pictures of Mr and Mrs Lamb in Las Vegas and New York on honeymoon. Hope you win big Mr and Mrs Lamb, but then again, you already have eh?
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